Van Winkle (2003)
Dan O'Bannon (screenplay)
Guillermo del Toro (screenplay)
Genre: Action / Adventure / Comedy / Majickal Otherworld (more)
Tagline: Sleep while you can...the war has just begun.
Plot Summary: Professional monster hunter Rip Van Winkle disappears in the Catskill mountains while on the path to kill the bigfoot that killed his father. He awakens almost 200 years later in the midst of a secret supernatural war between bigfoots and (more) (view trailer)
Plot Keywords: Secret World of Magic and Mystery / Implied bigfoot sex / Topless vampire chick / Shotgun decapitation (more)
User Comments: WHERE CAN U GET THE SOWRD HE HAS IN THIS MOVIE??? THE ELFLASYER IS WAY MORE BADASS THAN THE BLADE SWORD AND IT HAS THE BOOMERANG HANDLE WITH THE GUN BUT THE KNIVE AND SWORD PLACE DOESNT HAVE IT ANYBODY?????(more)
User Rating: 5.1 / 15 (3,606 votes)
Cast overview, first billed only:
Jared Leto ... Rip Van WInkle
Rachel Weisz ... Annabelle Van Winkle
Ron Perlman ... He of the Foot
Doug Jones ... Lord Meddowych
Paul Giamatti ... Mayor Eisenbaum
Richard Brake ... Russian Vampire Mafia Leader
Karl Urban ... Blackfoot
Korn ... Themselves
Also Known As:
More Yankee Frippery (UK)
Message to the People of the Galaxy (Spe)
Das Neus York Monster Krieger XXII (Ger)
Ha'atin' ohn ah Hhmman (Elf)
Runtime: 210 min
Country: CGI New York America
Language: English, Faux Gaelic
Color: Heavily Filtered
Aspect Ratio: (0.0) -(x.x)- Ahhhhhhhh!!!
Sound Mix: Over-orchestrated BS
Certification: UK: Horses for Divorces 13 / Spain: Thuper Grathiath / Space: Human Record of Monster Slaying / Germany: Untz Untz Untz 99 / Elfland: Ga'ay Sh'idht
AMDB Memorable Quotes:
He of the Foot: Kill me if you must, Van Winkle.
Rip Van Winkle: You don't remember? 200 years ago...you killed my father.
He of the Foot: No!
Rip Van Winkle: Now look at you. Just another filthy bigfoot stalking the back alleys of my city.
He of the Foot: It wasn't me. It was...Blackfoot.
Rip Van Winkle: Why should I believe you, a lying old bigfoot?
He of the Foot: Because I can take you to another. Another...Van Winkle.
Annabelle Van Winkle: You see them too? How??
Rip Van Winkle: I'll explain later! Hand me that crossbow!
Annabelle Van Winkle: Explain now!
Rip Van Winkle: I'm your great-great-great- (shoots a Russian vampire mobster in the heart with the crossbow) great-great-great-great-great-grandfather.
Annabelle Van Winkle: And I thought you were trying to pick me up.
Rip Van Winkle: I work alone. (Frags a dark bigfoot with an incendiary grenade.)
Annabelle Van Winkle: If this Blackfoot has taken over the bigfoots and made an alliance with the Russian vampires, there's only one faction left that might help us.
Rip Van Winkle: No!
He of the Foot: They've always been fair to my people.
Rip Van Winkle: Your people aren't humans. No!
Annabelle Van Winkle: Rip...
Rip Van Winkle: No! I will never make a deal with the elves.
Lord Meddowych: You are the first human to be admitted to the fairy court in over a thousand years. You should feel honored.
Rip Van Winkle: You should feel honored I haven't taken out my sword. It's met a lot of elves.
This libtard terminator keeps asking for guns that don't exist and I may have to close early out of frustration.
Editor's Note: Due to a freak power outage, this obituary of Barbara Bush was written without the benefit of research. In order to pay our respects to this great woman in a timely fashion, we have decided to post this piece as-is. We hope you forgive any errors on our part.
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